i guess this day... or yesterday for that matter... was one interesting day...

it started out with uneventfull hours... and then something amazing happened!!! :P *i know i know... that's one old line... but hey... if it works... it works...*

:P as to what that something was... i dont think i can tell you... but i think i can tell you that it was... umm... a real surpise in the sense that i still can't believe it happened... and that it was probably one of the nicest things that ever happened to me... :P

***sigh*** i guess i still can't get over the fact that it happened... oh well... what's done has been done... :) besides... i dont think i'll have it in any other way...

i guess i'll cut this off here...

thanks BLOGGER for the netspace!!!

:) dale's leaving for norway today... that knowledge really freaked me out... but then again... he explained that he wouldnt stay there for good... atleast... not yet...

he'll be gone for four days...

oh well...

what to rant about?

visited someone the other day... :) felt bad... really bad... i can't start to wonder what it's like for him to be in a box... does it hurt to see someone like that??? yup... it really does hurt... especially if it feels like he didnt deserve it...

and i guess what hurts more is the fact that i can't really do much for him... :) but that's me i guess... useless... if i can't help myself out much... how can i possibly help others?? neh?

but i can't be like this right? it's like... i dont deserve to be happy... but i dont have the luxury to feel sorry for myself either... it's just not fair for me to do so... :)

saaaaaa...

april 3, 2004 @ the glorrieta activity center would be the anime convention thingy that is sponsored by ANIMAX... can't go... i mean... i dont think i'll be able to go... :P my dad's leaving on april 4... so i have to spend every single waking moment with him... :) can't let time go to waste... coz you cant have it back...

:)

i guess that's enough wallowing for one day...

thank you BLOGGER for the net space!!!

ciao

saa...

i have a party to attend to later...

mimi's debut dance party!!!

isn't it just plain dandy?

:P

okay... am not as ecstatic as i was about it when i got the invite... *sighs* forget about it...

okay... moving on to more "important" matters at hand...

i can't think of any...

allow me to get back to you on that one later...

ciao!!!

thanks a bunch BLOGGER for the net space!

okay... damn it!!!

if i'm surrounded by romantic fics that make me say "awwwww" and "wish i had a koibito too" {koibito is lover in japanese} then i'm not just gonna rant my ass off about missing a boyfriend and stuff...

i'm gonna finish that stupid fic even if it kills me!!!

hope it works out well... i'm not that confident about my fic-writing skills... @.@

*huff* i was up till almost two in the morning sorting out details for rika's debut... invites will be given out later ppl!!! watch out for it...

anyway...

ueno-san!!! the following part of this post happened with you in mind... so... just read on why dont ya?

here is the first ending song of D.N.Angel

Yasashii Gogo A Graceful Evening

romaji:

sasayaka na jikan mo wazukana mune no itami mo
KIRAKIRA to kagayai te totemo itoshiku omoeta

kimi wa damatte iru kaze ni yurare te iru
sore ga tada ureshiku te sukoshi uta o utatta

mitsume rare ta ra hontou wa iki mo deki nai
nee, warawa nai de

sasayaka na jikan wa shizuka ni nagare yuku
kizuka nakatta keredo haru wa soko ni ki te ita

yagate nani mo kamo sora ni tokeru no
yura yura yura tadayou dake

kaze ni datte nareru yo nagare ni makase te tooku e
itsuka sotto kie you dare mo JAMA sarenai you ni
sotto...
sasayaka na jikan wa shizuka ni nagare yuku
kizuka nakatta keredo haru wa soko ni ki te ita

chiisa na te no naka no chiisa na sekai de sae
KIRAKIRA yo kagayai te marude yume no naka mitai

marude yume no naka mitai

marude yume no naka mitai

english:

even peaceful time and the sorrows of a small heart
appeared to be shining very beautifully

the wind blows against the silent you
that's just so pleasant I sing a little song

when you stare at me, I can't really breathe
hey... please don't laugh

peaceful time passes away silently
I didn't notice it but spring has come

soon everything will reach the sky
just swaying swaying swaying and floating there

you can stand in the wind, flowing far away in the stream
lets quietly disappear so that no one can interfere
quietly…

peaceful time passes away silently
I didn't notice it but spring has come

even the tiny world in our tiny hands
are glittering, shining as if we're inside a dream

as if we're inside a dream

as if we're inside a dream


that would be all folks!!! for requests and stuff just slap it on my tag board!!!

disclaimers: lyrics are from Anime Lyrics

BLOGGER is the best!!! thanks for the netspace!!!

ciao~

i forgot to mention i updated my anime ost collection:

here are the items i started with:

sailormoon best collection {-- yeah yeah!!! it was a gift god damn it!
YuYu Hakusho best collection {-- i have two of these of different sorts... the other one is the image album i think...
Gravitation soundtrack {-- from the bestest oniichan ofcourse
Rurouni Kenshin Best Collection {-- you know the white one that has kenshi, kaori, sano, yahiko, etc on the cover
Weiß Kreuz Best Album {-- Die Bleibende Erinnerung
Gensomaden Saiyuki Best Collection {-- only has 14 songs but what the heck!
Gensomaden Saiyuki Original Sound Track Vol. 2 { -- yes, i dont have the 1st volume!!! freaking anime stores ran out of it!!!

OKAY HERE ARE THE NEW ONES!!!

D.N.ANGEL Original Sountrack I { -- *grins* yup!!! the red one with daisuke as the cover dude... really really really bishie!!!
D.N.ANGEL Original Sountrack II { -- *grins even more* Yes!!! i have them both!!! this one has Hiwatari-sama on the cover page, real blue and royal and bishie and shit!!! he is sooooooooooooo meant to be with dai-chan-sama!!! RIKU AND RISA MUST DIE!!!
Rurouni Kenshin BEST COLLECTION {-- this one is different has four piccies on the cover... has more tracks also...
PRINCE OF TENNIS ost!!! {-- *faints* Echizen-sama, Tezuka-sama, Kikumaru-sama, Fuji-sama, Oishi-sama and Momo-chan-sempai are like the coolest tennis players everrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!! *turns into a big puddle of goo*

that's all folks!!! teeeheee...

thanks BLOGGER for the netspace!!!

it turns out the post i made yesterday wasnt exactly put up here... my pc froze up yesterday while i was clicking on the post and publish button... oh well...

came across this guy in irc... he asked if he could have my number... told him he cant so i just asked him to give his number instead... once on the phone i found out that i'm not liking him... i was still online and was talking to him on the other phone... then he asked me if i have a boyfriend... told him i dont... and the next thing i knew he was asking me if it's alright for me to be his baby...

so i told him no... why? because for one thing i know squat about him and vise versa, i know i didnt like him then and lastly it wasnt exactly practical and wise for me to just agree with him... he said he would court me after i agree to become his girl... HOW CRAPPY IS THAT??? he kept on asking me to give him a chance... i was like, chances are somewhat easy to give... but i dont give chances the way you want them...

i'm not a big person of conventional courtships and relationships... but i am a big person of get to know that person first before anything else!!!

***sighs***

gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!! why am i always given these kinds of ... stuff?!?!?

who am i to talk? i get to experience worse things and i whine about this guy?

got to get my brain checked again... there's probably a tumor or two in there...

oh well...

thanks for the net space BLOGGER!!!

ciao~

finished watching D.N.Angel... this really sweet anime is about this guy named Daisuke who turns into Dark, the great phantom theif/angel guy who is being sought after by Satoshi who has Dark's other self inside his body. Satoshi's anti-dark inhabitant is named Krag.

i'm not going to spoil things for you and tell you the whole plot...

as far as i'm concerned the anime is one of those "watch this anime if you're bored and would like an anime that has a semi non-conventional plot".

anyway... i want to show of this cute little thing i got from researching for DNAngel stuff on the net...


You're Satoshi!
DN ANGEL QUIZ
brought to you by Quizilla

:P Daisuke is cute and all but this result is not so bad really... :)

hmmm... oh yes...

the opening song for DNAngel is also something one should NOT ignore... it's really... let's see... how about you decide ne?

it's entitled "Byakuya ~True Light~" or White Night ~True Light~ in english...

here's the lyrics in ROMAJI

kanashii hodo hikari dashita
shiroi yami kirisaku tsubasa ni nare


tsumetai taiyou ni terasare teta
kainara sareta jiyuu ga atta
kagami ni utsutta kiseki no yoru
MASUKU(1) o hazushi hajime ta My Soul


kuzure te yuku abe no mukou wa
zetsubou mo kibou mo onaji kao suru
mita sare nai kokoro aru nara
tobi tateru shuumatsu no PUROROOGU e


yaiba no you na kaze fuku sekai
mamoru beki mono wa nan nano ka?
hitotsu hitotsu itami o shiru tabi
hontou no jibun e to chikazuku


kie yuku Fake Light
umare yuku True Light
kono te ni...


shiroku somaru yami tsuki nukete
atarashii jidai o kizami tsuzukero
toki wa nashita kokoro no mama ni
hateshi naku tsuzui teku byaku ya o tobe



and here's the lyrics in English!

a sad light shone
turning into wings that cuts the white darkness


shone upon by the cold sun
I had some limited freedom
the miraculous night cast by the mirror
started to remove my mask, my soul


on the other side of the collapsing wall
despair and hope looks the same
if there's a heart that's yet to be seen
lets head to the end of the prologue


in the world where the wind blows like a blade
what is it I should protect?
in a journey where I know one painful thing after another
I get closer to the true me


the fake light is disappearing
the true light is born
in these hands...


pierce through the night dyed in white
keep on creating a new era
create time with your heart
fly through the eternal white night



i like the lyrics... it suits the anime so well... plus i like the message it brings... life is full of despair and one may never distinguish hope from the pains of life... but then again... we should always go against the call to fall... the song didn't state any reason for that... just the advice to "fly through the eternal white night"... that's because the reason should come from one's self... a soldier should fight because in his heart he has wishes that should be fulfilled by his going into battle... not just because his superiors told him to...

well i think that's a pretty long post...

but before i go allow me to run down on the "DISCLAIMERS"

D.N.Angel is not mine...
so is the song that you see here in this entry...
and the lyrics i got from animelyrics.
the link to the webpage of the song is right above so if you need more lyrics on DNAngel or any anime for that matter just click away...

thank you BLOGGER for the netspace!!!

...once again i find myself speechless over something that i have decided to make an entry on...

why is that?

i dunno...

probably it's because i felt too much of it from her...

does she hate me? do you think she regrets having me here?

:) it would be better if she just said so... it's not so hard to have my departure from her life arranged... i would be more than willing to leave if it makes things around here a tad bit better... that's because it hurts more to have things lashed out at you bit by bit... along with those little things that are neglected or thrown at you... :)

i'm probably running away again...

but... tell me... how am i suppose to confront her? she is my mother after all... :)

am i being ungrateful? if that is the case... tell me... how am i suppose to act around her? am i to obey everything she tells me to do? sorry... that's a stupid question... ofcourse i should obey everything she asks of me... :) that's what the offspring does right?

:) just finished breakfast she prepared... i would have to say that... food prepared with anger, hatred and an insanely heavy heart tastes really different from normal everyday cooking...

saaa...

i'm not making much sense...

plus this entry just looks like a big whine to me...

thanks for the net space!!!

ciao~

I AM BOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!!!

i am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BORED!!!

as in bored to high hell!!!

as in bored beyond retribution!!!

somebody help!!!

:P well... that was constructive!

hehehe

will you give you guys something better to look at later today... daaaaaaamn i hate having to go to school for 7 fucking days a week

oh well...

that's life!!!

tc

ciao!

oh by the way

i have the pictures taken on my debut!!!

anyone who wants to burn the pictures that have them in it are welcome!!! give me a ring... a text... an email... or a poke anytime!!!

post of the day?

here's one of the songs off the back to the 2 inch album of Slapshock

it's entitled without you... and it's a nice love song...

make the time to listen to this song if you can't afford to listen to the whole album...

ja~

Slapshock Without You

Turning slowly and spinning around
got me open to a high new sound.
Into my realm fill my sorrow, if you are real, then ill follow

I can never be without you
I will hold to and never doubt you
come much closer so I can feel you,
thats all im asking,
now that I've found you.

You think you understand, If i lose my mind
I was thinkin' there'll be a time sometimes
If you walk away, got a lot to say, oh how much it kills me, everything.

I'm nearing our space, wasting our time.
Kindly solice, to free up my mind.
Give inside you, with good intention
all i need now is your obsession.

I can never be without you
I will hold to and never doubt you
come much closer so I can feel you,
thats all im asking,
now that I've found you.


You think you understand, If i lose my mind
I was thinkin' there'll be a time sometimes
If you walk away, got a lot to say, oh how much it kills me, everything.

Everything....
Everything....
Everything....

heal my wound,
so wild the emotions from in deep inside my soul.
No time to walk away no reason for me to stay.
Up this place of woe.

And heal my wounds,
so wild the emotions from in deep inside my soul.
No time to walk away no reason for me to stay.
Up this place and let me go.

You think you understand, If i lose my mind
I was thinkin' there'll be a time sometime
If you walk away, got a lot to say, oh how much it kills me, everything.

Everything...
Everthing...
Everthing...

shit...

so i managed to pull through the debut thing last night...

er... wouldnt say it was all that good... but i wouldnt say it was all that bad...

i guess it was bittersweet... just like everything else in this forsaken world...

let's see... i got lots of gifts... actually... i never this much before...

tonikaku... [anyway in japanese]

i should move on with... er... more important things

my sister gave me two cds for my birthday... first cd would be the cd i've been itching to get my hands on since i heard of it... back to the 2 inch by slapshock and between the stars and waves by rivermaya...

ive finished listening to slapshock and i think them coming up with back to the 2 inch is one of the greatest ideas put into motion... that album really is a compilation of the combination of the geniuses of slapshock as a band along with the insanely talented people in the music industry... such as bimbo yance, lee andre "quaizy illeon" katindoy, francis guevarra, ferdie marquez, rey "lowkey da boy wonder" bajamunde, freq. foundation, anton, ramos, jamir garcia, squid 9, kerryl demeterio and rico blanco...

i havent finished listening to rivermaya's between the stars and waves yet but from what i have heard so far... the album is far from being the flop of the century... ***duh! it's rivermaya?!?! since when did they produce crappy songs/albums?*** the album features a relatively new sound but still manages to say it's rivermaya... the songs are very relaxing and sets you into the mood that the song is all about... i'll write more about it once i've finished listening to the whole thing...

saa...

i'll cut myself off here...

thanks blogger for the net space!!!

ja~

hmmm... i guess this day wouldnt be so bad...

started it out by staying in bed on my stomach and lexus (my cute orange cat) warming my back...

hope i get to write another poem today...

i got over the drama episode yesterday... lol that was insanely silly and foolish of me...

do forgive me for trashing net space just like that...

i wont waste my time thinking of something relative to me to post up here... and i wont waste your time to understand by stupid rants...

here's a little song to think about...

Nine Inch Nails Something I Can Never Have lyrics

i still recall the taste of your tears.
echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears.
my favorite dreams of you still wash ashore.
scraping through my head 'till i don't want to sleep anymore.

[Chorus:]
come on tell me.
you'll make this all go away.
you'll make this all go away.
i'm down to just one thing.
and i'm starting to scare myself.
you'll make this all go away.
you'll you make this all go way.
i just want something.
i just want something i can never have

you always were the one to show me how
back then i couldn't do the things that i can do now.
this is slowly take me apart.
grey would be the color if i had a heart.

you'll make this all go away.
you'll make this all go away.
i'm down to just one thing.
and i'm starting to scare myself.
you'll make this all go away.
you'll you make this all go way.
i just want something.
i just want something i can never have


in this place it seems like such a same.
though it all looks different now,
i know it's still the same
everywhere i look you're all i see.
just a fading fucking reminder of who i used to be.

[Chorus]

i just want something.
i just want something i can never have
i just want something i can never have
think i know what you meant.
that night on my bed.
still picking at this scab
i wish you were dead.
you sweet and perry ellis.
just stains on my sheets.

i shouldnt be the one to complain about anything...

why?

because there is someone out there... who's experiencing worse than i am over even more horrible reasons...

what do i do when the tears dont want to stop falling???

what do i do when i really feel like breaking?

when the world i woke up to just this morning is one of the reasons why i want to be embraced by the darkness so bad?

what do i do when i really feel so bad?

what do i do when the people who are trying to help me are just making me feel worse?

what do i do when the only thing i'm depending on to make me feel intact is gone?

i'm not drug or alcoholic dependant...

i use music to keep me calm...

but what if i lost all the songs i need just like that?

solution? download it right?

what if i need them RIGHT NOW?

what if i couldnt reach to my mask ontime???

what if i couldnt put it on?

i've never felt o vulnerably empty and insanely broken before...

and those who try to help are just making the wound open up even more...

what if i just died...?

that would mean an end to everything right?

would that be a better way out?

i can never understand the onslaught of life...

and i dont think i can every go around it... since i cant go through it...

will i just be infront of it?

a willing captive-slave for its every whim?

maybe this is what it's all about...

i dont know...

maybe i should just stop...