today was soo fun!

XD i can't even begin to describe it.

heehee

it's not fair

it really isnt. but it's something i can't do much about. it is during moments like these that i regret spending time with you. i dont know how it turns out for you. but there are only disappointments waiting for me at the end. i'm too much of myself to think that maybe it's hard for you too. funny thing is that i'm the only one who has to suffer. '

i guess you're right.

i am conceited in the wrong god damn way.

kurushii yo.. totemo kurushii...

na.. when do you think we would talk again? you said you'd call but you never did. it's fine though. i wasn't really serious when i asked you to. i should stop talking to you altogether. i might actually look forward to a promise that would just go belly up.

kuma-chan doko?

it was a pretty good dream to. and i actually did look forward to it. i think i still do.. but i really shouldn't. it's not right. you ought to just save the money you would have spent on buying and sending it over.

baka na, watashi ga..

i've known you for a really long time. and i've lost you more than once. but we're talking again.. so i suppose that's good. but i can't seem to recognize you. you and i forget each other and out of the blue we reconnect only to part ways again. it's too much of a predictable cycle that i can't seem to break.

i think i'm crying inside. but even if that's the case..

anata ni aitai..

your world.. never mine

i'm going to learn to hate you because missing you is too painful.

that way, i'm never going to care if you never look my way again.

or i'm never going to have my hopes up just to have them shot at pointblank when you do.

clickity click effing click

so far. and i dont just mean physical distance. THAT i dont mind at all. but so much in between us. it's not even fun anymore.

i want an ethan.

my dad left today. i have to admit i felt a little down when i couldnt go with him to the airport because i had classes. mrs. lecheron was nice enough to let me skip today's class so i could talk with pops till he wasnt allowed to use his phone in the plane anymore. heeheehee.. i have to admit, i'm not really used to him leaving. i had a hard time keeping the water works down because i was inside the library. thankfully, it was nearly empty save myself and the librarians. XD

it's never easy having someone drift away from you. kainis! i hate it even more when the world is going out of its way to show me that the distance between me and people in question is growing by the fucking second!

there are moments when some people from waaay way way back all of a sudden pop back into your life. nothing so serious and grave. just old acquaintances calling up to say hello.

[life is such a duck.]

there are some people who just hang on to you like they actually mean it. they're crazy by themselves, up the ante when they're with you and just go bezerk when all three of you are together in a room. XD jay and jess. you guys are two sick umm.. -.-;; guys! yep. guys. :P nah.. they're really quite nice. a whole lot over board most of the time. but still nice. love you both~

//luis! they dont allow people to fedex every variety, let alone a single kind, of PANCIT CANTON. sorry~//

i went on a trl errand today with my EIC, ethel. XD it was fun! it would have been more fun if ILA was there but.. ch~ we got ourselves inside a cab after loading up with cash from the corner bank. we motored to sm north where we placed ourselves inside cyberzone. the item we had to find? an affordable, reliable and a good, if not great, digital camera. after much store hopping and deliberating, we ended up purchasing a PREMIER DV5040, a 5 megapixel cam, 3 megapixel video cam, pretty decent webcam, mp3 player and voice recorder all assembled in a tiny metallic baby blue package. XD added to that was a 1G sd card, a battery charger hub and 2 pairs of rechargable batteries. we ended up saving more than i expected, so ethel allowed our nourishment (mcdonald's cheeseburger meal, upsized) and transpo (it was raining so we both got cabs). heehee. ah the joys of a free late afternoon lunch! ^^

next up for the trl? hell if i know. the academe is too much of an academe to let us be a student publication that is for the students. *sigh*

i need to learn basic accounting and management. i want to!

rafael has a new look:

got CAD?

surprise surprise~

this is what happens to me when i finish reading something really and i mean really good.

I am in love once more. It happens every time I open a book, turn its pages and lose myself within its sea of words.

My dark sullen world is reborn every time I hold in my hands the gentlest and wisest of all bound made realities. It brings me life and death like longed for presents wrapped up in a beautiful bow.

Words become pictures. Pictures become animated. The animated become real. They speak to me when they speak to another. They hold me when they dance together. They love me when they do each other.

I am afraid I will never love a mortal man like I would with the endless beings in literature. No man I will hold closer to my heart than Lestat and Morpheus. No man will satisfy me like they do.

In fiction is my reality, my life, my everything. I will forgive no one who chastises what they do not know or even understand. I will forgive no one.

I bow before those who made me feel joy. I am forever grateful to those who gave birth to the dreams that I now own.

Now, I desire to never be at a loss again. To be blessed upon with wonderful dreams to my last breath. I wish to live till the moment I die.

Within these pages I have found a home.

it just happened.

mad season

I feel stupid but it's something that comes and goes

And I've been changing, think it's funny how no one knows

We don't talk about the little things that we do without

When that whole mad season comes around

yeeeep~ i feel incredibly silly. im excited about school starting up again.. but i still dont like it. i wish i was on vacation forever.. but i cant have that now can i? :P oh well...

i still have a lot hanging over my head. more than a handful of articles to write, print and pass; coventions to attend and take pictures of; get my cgm; salvage my stuff from brownies; have a social life and think of a way to acquire//"make" money. ~.~ much luck to me

Do you think you can cope

You figured me out that I'm lost and I'm hopeless

I'm bleeding and broken, though I've never spoken

I come undone in this mad season

i'm really glad online schooling has reached the philippines. my dad's interested in taking a couple of courses and so am i. ^^ i can make time. heehee i think.

hmmmmmm... care packages. what would you like in yours? i'm thinking of sending drew the beaded accessory thing that he asked for and umm.. i have no idea. i dont think they would allow me to fedex a piece of accessory. o.O perishable goods are a definite no-no. umm.. crap.

pretty, pretty metallic black pearl/zildjan drumset. i wish i had a picture to show. myuu myuuu~

you guys ought to try this.

lyrics are from matchbox20's mad season

oh me of little intellect

i had a blast with the movie benchwarmers. heehee. i thought it was just going to suck big time not because i thought it had a lame plot but because of the retards seated behind us. apparantly they were too busy fucking each other when good morals and right conduct was being taught. they were too bloody loud and just plain idiotic. i was an inch away from shoving their drinks down their throats, cup, straw and all.

thankfully, the movie distracted them. they laughed when there was something to laugh about and they kept saying profanities like it's the "cool" thing to do.

so yeah... the benchwarmers. incredibly fun movie. not too sappy come the conflict and drama part. so it's all good heehee. anyone wanting an instant laugh trip should watch this film. ^^

i think we just scrapped any plans of seeing over the hedge. :P i like cute furry cg animals but nothing beats the idea of seeing antonio banderas' new movie, take the lead. yup. me sucker for dance movies that make sense. heehee

on more serious matters..

jess i'm sorry! i really am..

you can't be serious

for just this week alone, i have seen two movies, the da vinci code and X-men 3. today, i might see over the hedge or benchwarmers or both.

i do not feel up to it

i feel lousy. again.

there's nothing good on tv. i still have to go to mapua.

oh well

i thought i jammed my summer up with a whole bunch of activities so i wouldnt have to fall into these weird emotional lapses that make me feel like i am the most pathetic protozoa out there. i made a mistake. while i signed up for summer classes and what not i forgot about the time between the last day of summer classes and the first day of the school year.

i am such a genius!

just wait till i get my hands of some dough. i'm going to be swimming in anime till my eyes are all bloodshot and sore!

i ought to work on my articles..